DEAR ABBY: I have been married 45 years. It may not be the most loving or agreeable marriage, but it has always been steady, nonviolent and monogamous. Last year I had COVID, and I now have long-term symptoms with compromised immunity.
I recently had a bad outbreak of genital herpes. My doctor told me it can lay dormant for many years — but 45? My husband swears he has been faithful, and part of me believes him. I WANT to believe him — but I know I have never cheated. Neither of us ever had problems with breakouts, other than one many years ago we thought was probably heat rash when he worked outside in the summer. This has caused me to lose trust in him and wonder if he’s lying. Our sex life, which had always been healthy, has stopped.
Have you ever heard of herpes being dormant for this long? I’m so embarrassed and angry. I haven’t told anyone. I have never heard of this. — PERPLEXED IN MISSOURI